How to Find Your Voice: Channeling the Queen of Swords and Opening Your Throat Chakra
Finding your voice.
This topic has been on my mind the past 2 months.
I've started to become so aware of the times where I shrink myself, where I don't speak up when I want to, where I say "yes" or "maybe" when I want to say no, where I tell a little white lie of an excuse to cover up the REAL reason I'm saying no, where I don't speak my truth, where even when I'm the teacher in a yoga class I worry what my students are thinking about my meditation or my closing or whatever it is.
Those times are WAY more often than I'd like to admit.
What I've realized is that they all come down to a fear of being SEEN.
Because when we're really seen, we're not hiding behind all the garbage layers of what society has told us to be and our parents have told us to be and the middle school girls who made fun of us made us feel like we had to be and everything else that is outside of us that has shaped us. When we really find our voice and speak our truth, we're really being seen as we are at our core. Raw and vulnerable and that is TERRIFYING.
I'm going to get into some practices to help you find your voice, but first I want to talk about the Queen of Swords. I did a Facebook Live about this (which turned into two Facebook Lives because thank you bad internet connection)-- you can watch them here and here -- but traveling alone in Egypt for the past month taught me how to find my voice in a big way.
I've traveled alone extensively, to places that shock people and prompt them to remind me how dangerous so and so country is, but Egypt was even a whole different experience for me. I had to get REALLY comfortable with saying no. At first I said no and stumbled all over myself to explain why I couldn't go into this guy's shop or ride in his felucca or let him take me somewhere-- I'm meeting a friend, I have to go do a tour, I'm going to lunch-- but slowly (if you've ever been to Egypt you know what I'm talking about) I had to stop.
I had to let no stand on its own. No explanation, no excuse. Just no. Just no, I don't want to.
How often do we do that?!
I realized that I almost NEVER do that in my life.
I was channeling some serious Queen of Swords energy. If you're not familiar with the tarot, the Queen of Swords is water and air. She can be a cold bitch, to be honest (and sometimes I felt like one), but she doesn't have to be. She is fiercely protective of herself. She rules boundaries and the sacred no. She's not fucking around.
She's a hard archetype to step into. She was difficult for me. A few months ago I asked my cards which queen energy I was in and drew her, and I was like ugh. I wish I drew the Queen of Cups.
But here's what she teaches: how to set boundaries. How to say no. How to FIND YOUR VOICE.
And you know what else helps you find your voice?
Throat chakra opening.
That has been my practice for the past two months, and it started with stepping into fear. I was asking a client for a massive price increase-- something I knew I deserved (and ultimately got, yay!)-- but it felt really, really uncomfortable. It was much easier to keep going as things were, but I was feeling resentful of the work (which is work that I truly love) and I couldn't do it anymore.
So I started working on my throat chakra, and channeling Queen of Swords, and here we are. Here are some practices that I hope will help you find your voice, too. Get familiar with your sacred no. Set a boundary that needs to be set, even when it's uncomfortable. Allow yourself to be really seen in what is true for you.
1. Use sodalite. I have found sodalite to be such wonderful medicine for the throat chakra. The amazing part to me is how gentle the energy is. It not only opens your throat chakra, but it's also super calming and anxiety reducing. Sleep with it by your bed, wear it as jewelry, lay it on your body and meditate. I love to put it on my body when I give myself reiki. Speaking of which...
2. Reiki. Reiki is the number 1 thing that has helped me open not just my throat but all of my chakras. I'm a reiki practitioner, so I give myself reiki. If you're not and you don't want to pay for a full personal reiki session, look for reiki healing circles and community reiki in your city! They're a lot cheaper than getting a session done and are often by donation so you can give what you have.
3. Draw tarot cards. Ask your cards: what is holding me back from speaking my truth? What is my relationship with the Queen of Swords right now?
4. Get into your journal. What are the big, scary things about you that you secretly feel like, "If anyone knew this, they wouldn't love me. They would know how unworthy/shameful/terrible I really am?"
It's okay if you can't share those with other people (yet). Share them with your journal. Get that stuff out of your mind and onto your paper. You can shred it, burn it, flush it afterwards. But get those nasty thoughts, those secret shames, onto your page.
It helps take away their power. When you see them in writing, it helps put them in perspective.
Because when we can't find our voice, when we're afraid to speak our truth, it's like I said above-- it's about our fear of truly being seen and what will happen if we are truly seen. Often, it comes back to these fears you're writing down and beliefs you have about your own unworthiness.
When you root out those beliefs and offer yourself acceptance, your fear of being seen becomes so much less-- because when you already accept yourself, when you already offer love to those parts of yourself that you feel are shameful or scary, you don't need the acceptance of other people. You are enough.
This is a big one. This is the real work. So write it down. Journal it out. Let it flow, and don't self edit or judge yourself or paint things with rose-colored glass. Just let your truth come out. This is just for you.
5. Meditate. Obviously, this was going to be on the list. Meditating on opening your throat chakra is super powerful, and really accessible. I have a free 5-minute throat chakra opening meditation that you can download here.
Lastly, if you want to explore your relationship with your throat chakra and with the queen of swords, I have 3 tarot offerings available for you:
- Throat Chakra Deep Dive. This spread dives deep into your throat chakra to address what's blocking it, what's going on in your subconscious, and the work you can do to gently and lovingly open that energetic center.
- The Queens Spread. This spread explores your relationship with the 4 queens, including the Queen of Swords, and helps you discover which queen energy you're in right now, what queen energy you're being called to work on, and how you can integrate all 4 of these powerful archetypes into your life.
- 7-Card Chakra Medicine Spread. This 7-card spread takes a holistic look at each of your chakras, highlighting which chakras are blocked and offering you the medicine you need to open them.
Readings are available via Zoom and email, or in person in Philadelphia. Click here to learn more and book.